Resolutions: those promises we make to ourselves to do better and be better as we turn the page to a brand-new year … and will likely break by the time February rolls around, if we even make it past the first week. Why do we make them? Why do we break them? And how can we make them stick?
“People typically have goals to self-improve, and those goals are pretty constant,” says Dominic Packer, professor of psychology at Lehigh University. “But there are certain times of the year that cause us to take a step back and reflect more deeply on what we want to do in our lives. Who do we want to be? And New Year’s is certainly one of those times – a collective ritual we engage in every year to think back on what we’ve done in the past and who we want to be in the future.”
Research tells us that 38.5 percent of adults make New Year’s resolutions, and young adults ages 18-34 are the largest demographic in that group at 59 percent. Health-related goals are the most common, with exercising more, eating healthier, and losing weight coming in as the top three resolutions. So why are they so hard to keep?
Packer believes many of us fail because these resolutions have to do with self-control. “Eating less or healthier food, quitting smoking or drinking, procrastinating less – those goals all involve resisting or willpower. We make the resolution, but don’t necessarily take the next step to create a plan of how we’ll achieve it.”
Taking that next step after the resolution – making a plan for how you’ll achieve it -- can help set you up for success, according to Packer.
Relying on social connection, social support, and social pressure can be good ways to help us achieve our goals.
He suggests that self-control can get a big assist by going beyond what psychologists call response modulation, which is, in essence, just sheer willpower. “You’re trying to eat healthy, you’re confronted with a delicious-looking dessert, and you just … force yourself to not eat it.” That tends not to work very well, at least in the long run.
More effective, Packer says, is situation selection, in which you avoid opportunities to be tempted or create an environment that encourages a positive behavior. “So you don’t put yourself into situations where you’ll encounter desserts or cigarettes or whatever it is you’re trying to avoid. Or you wear your running clothes to bed and put your shoes right by the door, if your resolution is to exercise more.”
Staying motivated beyond January is another issue. Packer, whose 2021 book The Power of Us addresses research into how groups shape our identity, says joining a group of people with similar goals can be useful because they hold us accountable. “For instance, if you have a partner you jog with, you’re less likely to stay in your cozy bed if you’d be letting your friend down. Relying on social connection, social support, and social pressure can be good ways to help us achieve our goals.”
Research shows that social support and interpersonal strategies become especially important after the first six months of pursuing a New Year’s goal. And a big part of being successful is to quit quitting – those who successfully make a change are likely to experience, on average, 14 slip-ups during a two-year interval. But they don’t quit -- persistence and bouncing back after setbacks is vital.
So cheers to you in the New Year. If you do make a resolution or two and actually see it through, besides better health (or whatever you’re aiming at), you can claim bragging rights to being one of only 9% of people to achieve success!